Take steps to prevent child abuse during holidays

The holidays are upon us, which is good news for excited kids and family members anxious to re-connect. But many Texas parents struggle to find childcare while school is out and worry how they can afford the added expenses of holiday gifts and travel. The frustration and stress that many families experience this time of year often lead to more cases of child abuse or neglect.

For one Clarendon boy, the holidays became a nightmare in 2010 when his biological father began beating him on Christmas Eve. Twelve days later Chance Mark Jones was dead at the age of four. His father, Robert Babcock, is currently serving a life sentence for killing the boy. And Chance’s grandmother, Gayle Edes, is serving a 90-day sentence in the Donley County Jail for admittedly knowing about the abuse and doing nothing.

The reason Babcock began abusing his son is not known, but the Children’s Hospital Association of Texas reports that more than 65,000 Texas children are abused or neglected each year. Many times, economic and personal stresses are contributors to child abuse. For many parents, the holidays increase these stress levels because of the extra demands on their time, money and energy.

“Many children and adults have unrealistic expectations for a perfect holiday season,” Bryan Sperry, president of the Children’s Hospital Association of Texas (CHAT), said. “Additionally, arguments with family members, exhaustion from over-planning and dependence on food and alcohol – among other factors – can become a catalyst for parents losing their temper.”

To minimize the risk of abuse, it’s best to reduce unnecessary stress by planning ahead. The Children’s Hospital Association of Texas recommends the following tips that parents can use to avoid having a holiday meltdown.

Establish a family budget for holiday spending and be realistic about what you can afford.

Hold a family meeting to discuss holiday plans, and include the children in planning activities.

Post a calendar of family activities in a place where all family members will see it. Ask each person to remind you of school events, church activities, holiday parties, etc.

Limit travel. On top of everything else, long trips may be more than your family can handle. Suggest visiting relatives later in the year when things are calmer and you can enjoy the trip more.

Have your children make a list of elderly or shut-in neighbors in your area. Plan to share a meal, some of your time, or run errands for these neighbors. Explain to children that helping and sharing are important elements of special holidays.

Set family priorities for the season. A big cause of holiday stress is having too much to do in a short period of time. This year, sit down as a family and make decisions that are important to all of you.

Learn to say “no.” Fewer activities mean more time to relax and enjoy being with family.

If you do find that it is difficult to avoid being verbally or physically harsh with your children, stop and try the following:

• Take a deep breath and count to 20.

• Phone a friend.

• Take a walk outside.

• Ask for help.

• Place your child in time out or a safe area, such as a crib, and leave the room.

• Take a time out and leave your child with a responsible adult.

• Catch up on sleep.

• And most importantly, if you know of a child in abusive situation, take steps to stop it. Don’t take a Chance on child abuse this season.